Monday, 9 April 2012

The people I come up against whilst trying to be productive.

Inner Drill Sergeant: Grow up you worm! Get your lazy arse onto word and give me 1000 characters! NOW!

Inner Critic: (whispering) I'd stay on the internet if I was you... you know you'll only screw the essay up big time.

Inner Nanny: Aww, those weren't very nice things to say to yourself! You're clearly not very happy... maybe looking at nice things on the internet would be best right now.

Inner Total Bum: I'll work in a minute... just let me finish reading this... ooh, I wonder where that link goes...

Inner Political Crusader: Well, I was about to come off the internet, but then I found somebody being wrong. I am now positively entrenched in anger, and I feel that writing the offending person a billion page essay explaining why they're wrong is the only sensible course of action. Grrr.

Inner Suave Bellend: It's alright Louise, you've still got plenty of time to do that essay, why not stay online for a bit, Hmm? Come on, you know you want to...

Inner Jukebox: **begins singing the chorus of a Godawful song I haven't heard for years, over and over and over again**

Inner 'Maladaptive' Daydreaming: Hi Louise, it's only me... look, I know this is a bad time, but I got triggered unexpectedly by the word 'the', so I'm afraid it's no productivity for you for a least half an hour! Heeere we gooo.... la la la SHINY! :D

Inner Neurotic: But but but Personal Problems! We can't do any work until we've worked them all out!

Inner Idiot: I've got writers' block. Looks like you can't do that essay today. Sor-ee. :(

Inner Toddler: **after writing one word** This is boring, I wanna do something else. **starts to kick the metaphorical seat in front**

Inner Philosopher: Louise, your thinking is unfairly constricted by the techniques required in this essay. Therefore, I vote you don't do it for a while. You have far better uses of your time. Checking every blog you follow several times, for instance.

Inner Alice: Oh, this factual essay is so dreary... I would much rather read this book, all about a strange land quite unlike this miserable place.

Inner Perfectionist: No, don't phrase it that way, it sounds too informal! And that's the third time you've used 'the fact that' in three paragraphs. Not sure that that's proper usage of a semi colon, either. No, you don't need to delete that far! Come on, it's only grammar, what's the matter with you? Oh, and by the way, you aren't comparing thoroughly enough... ugh, I give up.

Inner Koala: Too... sleepy... can't... concentrate... zzzz

And all through it, the one sensible part of my brain, which probably has the patience of a saint by now, is like "Now, please, this essay really is quite important". Sometimes it wins. Usually though, it gives up, and no work gets done until Inner Clockwatcher springs up shouting "Louise, you have ten minutes to write this essay! Hurry up now, or else you'll be doomed!"

And then I write.

Yeah... I'll have this under control one day, I swear. :3

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Day 23: Your favourite artist of photographer?:

Well, I don't really take note of photographers, so I can't answer that one. Anne Stokes and Kirsi Salonen come to mind if I have to name favourite artists, although they aren't the only two whose paintings send me star-eyed. I'm a sucker for fantasy art in general. :3

1 comment:

  1. heh, wow reading this blog it's great to meet someone who can understand how crazy it is in my head. The exact same thing happen to me. One moment I'm like "I'll do some writing just after watching this or playing this" or "I'll do it tomorrow" as part of a slacker, but whilst writing I also get my inner perfectionist pointing out I don't have to use "the" everytime and that I can be more descriptive, as well as saying "the fact that" was used a few times already. Sometimes I end up starting up sentences entirely different because of that inner perfectionist.

    Hell, sometimes I worry about the shape of the paragraph, as if that has any bearing on the story itself. "The paragraph is odd shaped. Doesn't look right. Who's going to read a paragraph that's wonky like that?" but I of course have the drill sargent too as you do forcing you to sit there and focus on the work at hand, though I think my sloth is too powerful to be quiet :p

    I enjoy reading things blogs, would love to read more :)